How can you achieve happiness and success in life?
Some people say happiness is all about how much money you have. Other people say happiness is about your social status or education level.
The best science tells us something very different.
In an earlier blog, we talked about the meaning of life and your purpose in life, which is happiness, fulfillment. In this blog, we’re going to talk about how you can achieve happiness and success in life, and change the world while doing it.
We will keep it simple. Here is an overview:
Overview
Happiness in life comes from good relationships. There are three things you can start doing today to build the good, strong relationships that bring happiness. Seek wisdom, practice love, and get results.
Good, high trust, high performance relationships also give you the best chance for success in life—whether that is leadership success at work, leading your family at home, or success as a good citizen in the community.
Finally, when you are a good person with strong relationships, you have the best chance to help make our world a better place.
We call this overall approach to life Covenant Leadership.
Happiness Comes from Good Relationships
So, where can we find happiness in life?
The science is very clear. For more than 80 years, Harvard has been conducting the Study on Adult Development, and it tells us that happiness doesn’t come from money or social status or your education level.
Happiness comes from good relationships. That’s it.
Good relationships don’t just bring happiness in life, they also help you live years longer and feel healthier too.
The director who led the Harvard study for 30 years said, “Happiness in life comes from good relationships. Full stop.”
We should not be surprised by the results of the Harvard study. We are made for relationship. Relationship is hard-wired into our DNA. Relationship is fundamental to our biology.
If you give an infant all the food and water she needs, but you don’t give the infant love and physical affection, 4 out of 10 will die. Half of the survivors will have severe psychological challenges.
What is the worst way to bully someone? It’s not to yell at them or physically abuse them. The worst way to bully somebody is to shun them. To deny them relationship.
What is the worst place in prison? Solitary confinement. It deprives the prisoner of relationship. Over time, the lack of relationship can drive prisoners in solitary crazy.
Think about your loved ones. How good does it make you feel when you spend time with them? How bad do you feel when you break up?
When we face the end of life, no one says that they wish they had spent more time at work. Everyone wishes they had made more time for loved ones.
Happiness in life comes from good relationships. We are neurologically hard-wired for relationship. It is fundamental. It is built into our DNA.
Three Things Build Good Relationships
There are three things that build strong relationships. We call them the Covenant Virtues.
The more people trust your wisdom, the more they know that you love them, and the more they know that you get results, the stronger your relationships.
So, there are three things you can do, starting today, to build the strong relationships that will bring you happiness and success. Seek wisdom, practice love, and get results.
Three Areas of Relationships
If you are going to get good at those Covenant Virtues, you need places to practice them. There are three areas of relationship that you can do that.
The first place to practice those virtues is in your relationship with yourself. The second is in your personal relationships with your family and friends. The last place you can practice these is in your relationships at work and in the community.
It is straightforward. Seek wisdom, practice love, and get results in your relationships with yourself, with family and friends, at work and in the community. You will develop the strong relationships that bring happiness and success, and change the world.
And here is a key benefit: Every time you practice a covenant virtue in one area of your relationships, it makes you better in every area of your relationships. For example, when you practice love in the community by giving up a parking space or opening a door, it also helps you become a better, more loving person for your spouse and kids at home.
Covenant Leadership is simple. Your purpose in life is happiness, fulfillment. Happiness comes from good relationships. There are three things you can do to build good relationships: seek wisdom, practice love, and get results. And there are three areas of relationship that you can practice these: in your relationships with yourself, with family and friends, and those at work and in the community.
Success Comes from Good Relationships
That tells us how covenant leadership can bring us happiness in life, but what about success?
Consider success at work.
If you have high trust, high performance relationships with your clients, they are going to give you more business.
If you have high trust, high performance relationships with the people that you work with, you are going to get more engagement and productivity.
If you put more client work together with increased productivity, you will have a significant competitive advantage that gives you the best chance for success.
Switch to your family relationships. When you have high trust, high performance relationships with your spouse and your kids, you build the foundation for success at home.
Finally, there is you. When you have a high trust, high performance relationship with yourself, you will be in the best position to know yourself, to love yourself and to become the best version of you in life.
Change the World
Covenant Leadership can help you achieve happiness and success in life. But how does it help you change the world?
Our world needs the best solutions possible. The best solutions come from wise people. The more wisdom you have, the more you change the world. Seek wisdom.
Our world needs to come together to solve the problems. The deepest, most committed relationships are based in love. The more you develop relationships based in love, the more you bring people together in good faith to implement the solutions. Practice love.
Our world needs to go beyond good intentions to actual results. The more you know how to get results, the more you will actually change the world. Get results.
Seek wisdom, practice love, and get results, and you will change our world for the better in multiple dimensions.
Covenant Leadership. Change the world.
Wrap Up
How can you achieve happiness and success in life, and change the world while doing it?
It is simple: Covenant Leadership.
Life is about happiness.
Happiness comes from good relationships.
To build good relationships, just do three things: seek wisdom, practice love, and get results.
Practice these Covenant Virtues in your relationship with yourself, in your personal relationships with family and friends, and in your relationships at work and in the community.
Good, strong, high performance, high trust relationships are the keys to your happiness and success—and to changing our world for the best.
What are you doing today to give yourself the best chance for happiness and success, and to change the world?
I’m Pete Bowen.
